We’re back with the cast of Jersey Shore! Still in Italy! Still lacking self-awareness! That’s fine. Means more incredulous observations for us!
Let’s watch and learn.
Speaking of learning…just what did we find out about guidos in Italy?
- Deena will do the Jersey Turnpike anywhere, and that’s not just a motto, that’s a promise!
- JWoWWW, uh, looks bigger in the boob department and smaller in the nose department
- Sammi is now COMPLETELY DONE AND OVER RONNIE. HEH.
- Vinnie plans to get rather friendly with the bidet.
- Pigeons are the equivalent of a Guido Kraken!
- Snooki has a boyfriend.
- The Situation wants to maybe be Snooki’s boyfriend! WHAT?
- Deena and Pauly experimented with Upper GI scoping with their tongues
- Italy may regret this…all of it
One of our very own commenters was nonplussed about the potential for a Snooki and Situation love (see: Boning) connection:
DoctorZizmor:
Well, Doctor, I’d maintain that MTV doesn’t really care what we want! No one would like to see Snooki and Sitch get down in infrared like MTV despite what effects it could have on our digestive tracks. So we’ll just have to stock up on Cipro and brace ourselves.
Well, now that we’ve got that all cleared up…let’s get started!
10:00 It’s on! Yikes. How often do we need to see and hear about the magical Sitch and Snooki hook up. I’d say Pics or it didn’t happen…but he’d show me.
10:02 NO, PAULY, THAT IS NOT GOOD KISSING. THAT IS A FELONY IN SOME STATES!
10:03 “So, what happens if we f***? Will you still like me in the morning, or will you want more than just f***? Because I want to f***!” Such a gentleman.
10:04 Deena Fell! Drink!
10:06 Deena tried the old no panties and try to smush trick. It didn’t work. Apparently, Pauly thought the Jersey Turnpike was closed.
10:10 Pauly, why are you up so early. Are you late to go catch fish?
10:11 Hey, Sitch…Nice Nipples! We think you need a windbreaker or a bra!
10:12 Electronics are not the guido thing. This has been proven time and time again.
10:13 Wow, JWoWWW, your voice is really nasally.
10:15 Anyone who talks about themselves in the third person is NOT good at relationship advice.
10:16 Given all the touching, Snooki I think you should file a sexual harassment suit.
10:16 Sitch is like a vampire…once you invite him he thinks he owns your ladyjam.
10:20 Italians everywhere just died. Literally died at the Dominos pizza in Italy reference.
10:23 Yes, Pauly, spinning records is EXACTLY like making pizza.
10:24 Guido coffee…banging coffee beans with a meat tenderizer.
10:26 JWoWWW’s nose is talking to Ronnie about his “back up chick”
10:27 Also, drunk, dancing Ronnie is possibly the best Ronnie ever.
10:31 “I’m the Pimp Daddy Mack of this Whole Place and All the Toilet Paper!”
10:32 CRAP! Well, the non-drama Sammi and Ronnie lasted exactly one episode.
10:33 Ronnie Fell! Drink!
10:33 Deena Fell! Drink!
10:34 SITCH! What was that face? Pop, pop? Yes, exactly, smushing with your Pop-Pop!
10:36 Hey, Sitch, Snooki doesn’t want you. But you won’t believe me. You’ll keep trying until it’s uncomfortable for everyone in the house.
10:41: Just like a schoolgirl with a secret…the Sitch can’t wait to gossip.
10:42 Ronnie and Vinnie have decided to take their relationship to the next level and experience the hot tub together.
10:44 Mike is officially a creepy stalker.
10:49: Deena Fell! Drink!
10:50: I can’t watch the Sam and Ron drama yet again. I don’t have the strength.
10:51 How do these people keep ending up with toilet paper on their person while in the club? Do they lay in it? Eat it? Drink it? Snort it? What’s the stock like for toilet paper in Italy?
10:57 Deena Denied By the Pauly Chapstick Rouse!
