Hey, everybody, here’s your Crass Gossip for Wednesday. Enjoy.
- Charlie Sheen. That is all. Google his name if you really want Charlie Sheen news. You get a picture and that’s it.
- But, because I’m a hypocrite, Tila Tequila would like to be Charlie’s only “goddess.” Because she was so good for Casey Johnson, right? Anyway, she says she can “show Chucky a good time- but also help him out.” Vomit, vomit, vomit. (The Superficial)
- Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are fighting viciously over custody of a NYC borough! Wait. They’re neither fighting viciously nor fighting over a borough. “The Bronx” is their son, and Fall Out Boy’s Wentz wants joint legal/physical custody. Simpson, who had a bit part in “The Hot Chick,” wanted primary custody. Sounds riveting. (US)
- Miley Cyrus is texting some guy from Kings of Leon. I guess she could…wait for it…”Use Somebody”? (Sorry.) (Dlisted)
- This is the headline of an actual article: “Kim Kardashian Is ‘Princess Jasmine’ At Hotels, Wears Tight Leather Pants.” In other “news”, I check into hotels as Ursula, the villain from “The Little Mermaid” (yes, I demand to be called by that full description) and wear striped pajama pants. Flannel if I’m feeling frisky. (The Huffington Post)
- Lindsay goes to court tomorrow. She could do jail time! She may not do jail time! She’ll plead guilty! She refuses a plea bargain! She’ll certainly be wearing clothing (Jesus, I hope)! We’ll talk about that more, you know, tomorrow. But if you can’t get enough, knock yourself out: (TMZ)
- You know who’s not doing jail time because he DID plea bargain? Mel Gibson. (Popeater)
- Lady Gaga’s apartment used to be filled with “bed bugs and roaches on the floor and mirrors with cocaine everywhere.” Stars: They’re just like us! (The Hollywood Gossip)
- Michele Salahi, apparently of “The Real Houswives of D.C.,” the one neither you or I watched, got kicked off of “Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew.” Fame addiction (her alleged affliction) is kind of like my “addiction” to hot bubble baths, I guess. You’ll never guess the answer to this, but is she pissed? SPOILER ALERT: Yes. Her dubious argument is that she has multiple sclerosis. I’m not a medical doctor, but while MS is a disease, it is not actually an addiction. (Dlisted)
- Maybe it’s a good thing Michele’s dangerous habit of speedballing fame isn’t being treated at Pasadena with Drew. (Joke, joke.) Mike Starr, former Alice in Chains bassist and part of Season Three of “Celebrity Rehab”, passed away yesterday at age 44. Cause of death is unknown, but Starr struggled for the better part of two decades with an opiate addiction. RIP Mike, and please think for a moment today of all those that have struggled with, succumbed to, or beat their addictions. (Radar)
So that’s our Hump Day. Very little sex involved. If you’re interested in collaborating with myself or Alluson, let us know in the comments if there’s a day you’d like to take or if you’d just like to throw some tidbits our way when you have them.
Edit by Alluson: Ms.Antropy has volunteered to do Thursday’s gossip, and the lovely ihatediamonds is covering Friday’s. Weekend duty is open!
